Star dreaming

I love the late winter. I like to reflect on my past year and appreciate how much has changed for the better. Then I envision my future and build my plans for making them a reality. Bold, brave and above all else, very pleasurable.

It’s Samson’s Birthday!

Me: It’s Sami’s 18 months old birthday! A whole year and a half! It’s his day to sniff and play and enjoy whatever he likes!

Husband: So many birthdays… didn’t we just celebrate 17 months a month ago?

Me: They don’t live as long as us.

Husband: Then at least seven birthdays a year are required.

Me: Thank you dear. 😉


She lives


Moves in slow circles,

Sometimes standing

for long minutes,

in a corner.

I stroke her coarse fur.


Her head lifts

and orients towards me.


she follows my rafts

wherever I go,

Bread crumbs through the forest

She eats,

Shoving her sharp nose

into every delicacy I offer her,

She sleeps.

I’m grateful when she does.

I tell her I love her,

A thousand times

I do.

It’s no antidote

nor protection against

the lump of losspain I see in the distance,

hunkered down and waiting.

It will come.

A giant black wave,

That will crash over my head

Crush my chest

and knock me down.

Nothing can stop that.

Not hope, nor prayer

Mantra nor talisman,

Not love, nor the tasty treats I offer her. 


I’ll hurt like hell

Until one day,

the Losspain will loosen,

Relax its jaws

And let me slip free.

Free, until the next time.


Today, the Canadian Kennel Club’ letter of congratulations and our Grand Championship Certificate arrived in the mail.

I’m so proud of this little girl…

In less than four years, she has achieved her Grand Championship in conformation, Novice Rally titles in AKC and CKC, Pre Companion Dog, and Agility Dog of Canada titles. 

All this while being the sweetest Schipperke, ever entertaining and lovable.

Just twelve days ago, Ruby was blindsided as she made her way towards a show ring, when a very large dog slipped out of his handler’s control and attacked her.

I was so shaken by this experience on so many levels.

Today, I am grateful that she is alive and is recovering like the champion she is.

She’s an indomitable little Schipperke.

Repurposing stuff

Today, I dismantled a single bed box spring with a pair of scissors and some needle nose pliers. It’s a fairly old box spring with Ruby chew marks at all corners.

Its next stop would be the landfill, so before that happened, I considered how I might repurpose it.

Box springs look quite luxurious in the store and they are pricey. It’s interesting to take one apart in about 15 minutes, revealing its less luxurious staples, cardboard, plastic, foam and polyester.


After stripping off the foam backed fabric, pulling out the staples, removing the large rectangle of cardboard, I was left with a fairly solid frame; screwed together, not stapled.

My plan is to bisect it and put wooden tops of each half to make two dog training platforms. I may decide to put some feet or wheels to elevate it from the ground and make them easier to move around outside.

image1Repurposing makes me feel happy.

Today, I am grateful for my husband who helps make my creative ideas a reality.


My life offers me many epiphanies, bolts from the blue and similar “oh my Dawg” moments. Sometimes, they stick with me and change me for the better. Other times, I nod and smile at Life’s lovely face and say ‘ I got it’ but She usually knows better.

Winning is obviously one of Life’s pleasures. Succeeding, nailing it, scoring big…these things feel scandalously awesome and are meant to be thoroughly enjoyed and never minimized.

Recently, Ruby and I won a Best in Show at a United Kennel Club dog show. I am unabashedly proud of that.

However, I didn’t learn a damn thing.

And there’s my epiphany.

I’ve always been a bit shy about making friends with Life’s best mate, failure. He intimidated me.  I just couldn’t warm up to him. So I usually do my best to avoid him and try not attract his attention at all. A strategy which is doomed to…failure.

Yesterday, after I experienced a nice, plump hunk of dog training failure,  I gathered up the shards of my confidence. I turned them over in the light, admiring their rainbow reflections as I built my new plans. That’s when it came to me.

I have never learned a damn thing from winning. As tasty as it is, it’s just the icing on a rich thick cake that’s layered and layered with spicy sweet failures.

I think I’m warming up to Mr. Failure.

He’s starting to look like a real dreamboat.

Travel readiness…

Ruby and I will be flying to Edmonton to attend our first Canadian National Schipperke Specialty in June. She’ll ride in the airplane cabin in this little bag, squeezed under the seat in front of mine.
I have played lots of crate games with her already to build value for staying in the small space.
Today, I took her to the airport for a little rehearsal. 🙂
After that, we headed to the beach for a little fun run.



The power of Feldenkrais…

I first learned of Feldenkrais from Alexandra Kurland, a remarkable trainer of people and horses. She talked about Moshe Feldenkrais’ personal life, education and his quite incredible work. She demonstrated how she applies his principles when teaching horses how to move their bodies more comfortably when under saddle.

I went home and immediately looked up Feldenkrais practitioners in Victoria, quite randomly picking out Brian Lynn’s name from the list.

In September, 2015 I attended my first class. I was fascinated with Brian’s energetic delivery and passion while leading the class through movements that I found myself utterly unable to process, never mind execute. I laughed with amazement at my own body blindness, having always believed I had excellent coordination and body awareness. For weeks, I just let Brian’s instructions flow over and around me like a creek over a stream bed.

I booked a private session (Functional Integration) with Brian, hoping it would ‘speed up’ the process a bit. After the very first session, I noticed positive changes. I noticed my arms were less constricted, falling away from my shoulders with less muscular tension and without conscious effort. That powerful sensation of relaxation in one area of my body motivated me further. I took two more private sessions and then continued with the weekly classes.

Even though I didn’t always feel results immediately after a class, I would try to recapture the feelings of the previous class during the days that followed. I would notice my body falling back into old habits and then springing itself back into the new sensations. Over the weeks and months that have followed, my posture and movements steadily became more comfortable, natural and pain-free.

I practiced kung fu for about 20 years, but had given it up because of severe pain in my right hip and leg. I’ve also applied Cognitive Behaviour Therapy strategies and dabbled in meditation over the years. These practices have strengthened my health and well being.

Nothing has produced as rapid, permanent and positive effect on my body and mind as Brian Lynn’s Feldenkrais classes and FI sessions. Long standing emotional and physical issues (trauma based) have literally melted away.

Feldenkrais is a self-education process and it only works, if you do. The insights and teachings of Moshe Feldenkrais are profound.  And while Brian is a brilliant Feldenkrais practitioner and a compassionate, dedicated, and respectful guide, our ultimate teachers are always within ourselves.

Fine without me

Ruby 2

I play with my dogs. A lot. But over last few days I was befriended by a virus, and slept a lot.

My dogs slept too. In the absence of all the usual cues I give them that another game is afoot, they just…

Slept, stretched, ate, pooped, slept, played without me, slept.
Occasionally barked.

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